I was invited to dine with a family some years ago while I was serving as the guest speaker for the church's Mission's Fair. They were a large family and their hospitality was just as great. As we sat for the meal the father led in prayer for God's gifts and barely took a breath from saying "Amen" before looking at me and announcing, "Life is short so I always eat dessert first."
I was impressed with his wisdom at the time, but, as I have aged I have come to realize that all that is good in life can be better appreciated after the less exotic tastes of beans, broccoli, and celery. While the broccoli feeds our nutrition and leaves us feeling good about our choices, it also clears our conscience for a small piece of pecan pie that feeds our taste buds.
I am reminded of the Wedding Feast at Cana of Galilee when Jesus was asked to supply more wine and rather than offering the pedestrian fair already consumed delivered a vintage with character eliciting from the Master of the Feast in John 2:10 the exclamation, “Everyone brings out the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now.”
Whatever has been on your plate this day - consume it - whether resolution of conflict, tedious book work, arduous cleaning and then be prepared for the dessert God has planned especially for you. It would not taste as fulsome served at the beginning of the day/life but it will be an eternal treat to hear, "Well done good and faithful servant, enter into your reward." I sure hope there is pecan pie in heaven.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
Prophet to Pastor
For most of my life God called me to be a prophet. One who loved Him and His church and was unwilling to allow the church to continue to run on only one rail. I saw the churches I was in and working with as being more concerned with nurture/fellowship and self improvement. I spent my energy focused on drawing them to a ministry of outreach. Then God did a strange thing. He changed me from Prophet to Pastor.
I mention this because I - being one of God's "special" children (as in "Be kind to Sherman is a bit...'special'"). I have had an epiphany of late and that is that the reason I have felt stymied in my ministry is because I have been thinking like a prophet when I am gift - now - as a Pastor.
This is going to require some thought - not to mention a bit of reprogramming. Be patient with me as God is not finished with me and I am finally on the same page as my Father.
I mention this because I - being one of God's "special" children (as in "Be kind to Sherman is a bit...'special'"). I have had an epiphany of late and that is that the reason I have felt stymied in my ministry is because I have been thinking like a prophet when I am gift - now - as a Pastor.
This is going to require some thought - not to mention a bit of reprogramming. Be patient with me as God is not finished with me and I am finally on the same page as my Father.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
The Stages of CultureShock Part 2: The 4 Laws
Stage 2 is exchanged for Stage 3 by those who have a healthy acceptance of own culture as one of many, but, their own never-the-less. They view host culture as an environment where how people interact my be different but not necessarily wrong, Pemberton’s first Law of Cross-Cultural Communication is, “It is not wrong, it is just different.” Of course, some things are patently wrong, such as infanticide but much less of a host culture is actually wrong – though it feels wrong to eat dog, for instance – and just different. I believe this is the first law for moving from “teacher” to “learner” and preparing oneself for a healthy transition.
The second law tag teams as “It Doesn’t Matter Why, It Only Matters That.” Once one agrees that what they are experiencing is merely different the next obstacle is the “why” question. For the purpose of living and learning one is best served to begin life accepting certain truths without searching for the origins of them. Why do some cultures not allow shorts, sandals, hats, the color red etc. in public places? It does not matter why – it only matters that you have learned this to be true so practice it. If you are asked to be a change agent – as in the case of a missionary – you may want at some point to know the answer to the question why, but for emotional health and good interaction it is unimportant.
The third and fourth are mirror images of each other and help learn the “that” mentioned in the last paragraph. At dinner with a host family one of family members “intentionally” passes the main dish by you to your seatmate which momentarily causes you to feel some slight has been given. First, “Never Assume” what you think you saw is what you actually saw. There are any number of reasons for that practice, none involving rudeness. If you practice Law # 3 then you will need to follow it with Law # 4 “Always Look for Alternate Interpretations.” Living in a new environment involves an endless cycle of Observe/Experiment/Adjust from Observation/Experimentation and repeat till satisfied that Stage 3 has been achieved.
Stage 3 is achieved when the irritation of Stage 2 has been replaced by an understanding that the irritant is “normal” for the place and time and it is ok to accept it as not necessarily “normal” for the traveler. I can live any place where dog is a meat without becoming a butcher of dog meat, or, anti-dog eating activist.
There is a Stage 4 to transition shock and it is achieved when the traveler can both understand and tell jokes in the local language receiving appropriate responses.
The second law tag teams as “It Doesn’t Matter Why, It Only Matters That.” Once one agrees that what they are experiencing is merely different the next obstacle is the “why” question. For the purpose of living and learning one is best served to begin life accepting certain truths without searching for the origins of them. Why do some cultures not allow shorts, sandals, hats, the color red etc. in public places? It does not matter why – it only matters that you have learned this to be true so practice it. If you are asked to be a change agent – as in the case of a missionary – you may want at some point to know the answer to the question why, but for emotional health and good interaction it is unimportant.
The third and fourth are mirror images of each other and help learn the “that” mentioned in the last paragraph. At dinner with a host family one of family members “intentionally” passes the main dish by you to your seatmate which momentarily causes you to feel some slight has been given. First, “Never Assume” what you think you saw is what you actually saw. There are any number of reasons for that practice, none involving rudeness. If you practice Law # 3 then you will need to follow it with Law # 4 “Always Look for Alternate Interpretations.” Living in a new environment involves an endless cycle of Observe/Experiment/Adjust from Observation/Experimentation and repeat till satisfied that Stage 3 has been achieved.
Stage 3 is achieved when the irritation of Stage 2 has been replaced by an understanding that the irritant is “normal” for the place and time and it is ok to accept it as not necessarily “normal” for the traveler. I can live any place where dog is a meat without becoming a butcher of dog meat, or, anti-dog eating activist.
There is a Stage 4 to transition shock and it is achieved when the traveler can both understand and tell jokes in the local language receiving appropriate responses.
The Stages of Culture (Transition) Shock Part 1
Transitioning from one living environment to another almost always involves a process typically referred to as transition shock or in the case of cross cultural transition, culture shock. Transition shock is most commonly described as being in four stages, which are described in terms of experiences and not in terms of length of time. Time is less of a factor than attitude. Some people will transition through three of the stages in relatively short time, only infrequently reverting to the most toxic, Stage 2, while revisiting Stage 1 and living in Stage 3.
Stage 1 is the time when transition is new and is usually full of new experiences, most of which are seen as “interesting,” “quaint,” or “unpleasant” without being unbearable. At some point, when it becomes clear the environment is going to continue to operate as first observed and not adjust to the “foreigner” in the midst, these observations will become “intolerable,” “antiquated,” or “unacceptable.” Whether entering a marriage, new school, or new country almost everyone moves from Stage 1 honeymoon to Stage 2 distaste. Moving through Stage 2 to Stage 3 – as opposed to bouncing from Stage 1 to Stage 2 and back again – depends on how one enters the new environment.
Enter as a teacher, one who has better information than the locals, and you are doomed to live in Stage 2. The danger is determined by how long you intend staying. Vacationer’s returning from France, for example, who spent their two weeks identifying the things that need to change for their comfort suffer minimally, usually by not enjoying their vacation, as long suffering friends and neighbors will attest. They will most commonly reject “host culture.” However, there is also the possibility of rejecting “own culture.” In the first instance the host culture is negatively compared to own culture using paternalistic and patronizing references to the “childlike” nature of host culture or “barbaric” choices of host culture. Less common is to negatively compare own culture to host culture thus rejecting personal history and focus points. Longer term workers for corporations, government, or missions can suffer depression even to the point of suicide in this cycle.
Stage 1 is the time when transition is new and is usually full of new experiences, most of which are seen as “interesting,” “quaint,” or “unpleasant” without being unbearable. At some point, when it becomes clear the environment is going to continue to operate as first observed and not adjust to the “foreigner” in the midst, these observations will become “intolerable,” “antiquated,” or “unacceptable.” Whether entering a marriage, new school, or new country almost everyone moves from Stage 1 honeymoon to Stage 2 distaste. Moving through Stage 2 to Stage 3 – as opposed to bouncing from Stage 1 to Stage 2 and back again – depends on how one enters the new environment.
Enter as a teacher, one who has better information than the locals, and you are doomed to live in Stage 2. The danger is determined by how long you intend staying. Vacationer’s returning from France, for example, who spent their two weeks identifying the things that need to change for their comfort suffer minimally, usually by not enjoying their vacation, as long suffering friends and neighbors will attest. They will most commonly reject “host culture.” However, there is also the possibility of rejecting “own culture.” In the first instance the host culture is negatively compared to own culture using paternalistic and patronizing references to the “childlike” nature of host culture or “barbaric” choices of host culture. Less common is to negatively compare own culture to host culture thus rejecting personal history and focus points. Longer term workers for corporations, government, or missions can suffer depression even to the point of suicide in this cycle.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Life Is Repetition
It strikes me the reason I get in trouble - well, most of the time - is when I forget that life is doing the same thing over and over, improving with repetition where possible and following the path previously laid, perfectly, when improvement is not possible (how do you improve teeth brushing?). Quite possibly the only reason I brush "every" morning is because I have always brushed every morning even when in places water is scarce or even tainted. I find a way, because, well, I always brush every morning.
It is not a great epiphany to catch the application to spiritual disciplines. My parents drilled into me the practice of brushing every morning. Though I have never thanked them for that discipline it has served me well. They also required a certain level of Biblical literacy - that required regular Bible reading - if only to respond to parental questions. They required regular church attendance and membership in a local church. All practices I do not find odious but rather feel empty without.
I needed to remind myself of this practice because I become bored with repetitious tasks - even irritated by the "mundane." Remembering the importance of most repetitions (breathing comes to mind) I now face them with more a sense of responsibility than requirement - which may seem a small thing to some but is the difference between joy, on the one hand, and drudgery on the onther.
It is not a great epiphany to catch the application to spiritual disciplines. My parents drilled into me the practice of brushing every morning. Though I have never thanked them for that discipline it has served me well. They also required a certain level of Biblical literacy - that required regular Bible reading - if only to respond to parental questions. They required regular church attendance and membership in a local church. All practices I do not find odious but rather feel empty without.
I needed to remind myself of this practice because I become bored with repetitious tasks - even irritated by the "mundane." Remembering the importance of most repetitions (breathing comes to mind) I now face them with more a sense of responsibility than requirement - which may seem a small thing to some but is the difference between joy, on the one hand, and drudgery on the onther.
Monday, August 10, 2009
How Fast Are You Walking?
A fellow was walking along a country road when he came upon a farmer working in his field. The man called out to the farmer, "How long will it take me to get to the next town?"
The farmer didn't answer. The guy waited a bit and then started walking again.
After the man had gone about a hundred yards, the farmer yelled out, "About 20 minutes."
"Thank you. But why didn't you tell me that when I asked you?"
"Didn't know how fast you could walk." (Received from Ann F. on Good Clean Funnies).
It got me to thinking about leading people to do what they have started to do, such as church attenders. Church Attenders have decided to move toward God and many of them want to be close to Him as soon as possible. They might even be heard asking, "When will I be able to face trials - overcome addiction - be the husband my wife needs?" Those along with many others. I think I have a tendency to try to answer that question before I see how fast they can walk.
The farmer didn't answer. The guy waited a bit and then started walking again.
After the man had gone about a hundred yards, the farmer yelled out, "About 20 minutes."
"Thank you. But why didn't you tell me that when I asked you?"
"Didn't know how fast you could walk." (Received from Ann F. on Good Clean Funnies).
It got me to thinking about leading people to do what they have started to do, such as church attenders. Church Attenders have decided to move toward God and many of them want to be close to Him as soon as possible. They might even be heard asking, "When will I be able to face trials - overcome addiction - be the husband my wife needs?" Those along with many others. I think I have a tendency to try to answer that question before I see how fast they can walk.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
When a Leopard Is Not a Leopard
When I was young I in the home of a family who had rescued a leopard cub from the poachers who had killed his mother. They had the "cub" in their back yard with their two Rhodesian Ridgebacks and often with their infant son. My dad expressed his concern but the Doctor assured him that if the leopard received "civilized" treatment he would become a good pet, "he is just a big kitty," explained the Doctor.
Six months later we stopped in to find the "kitty" had playfully killed the two lion hunting dogs and was deemed "beyond redemption." It doesn't take a great mental leap to conclude that nature - more often than not - will rule over nurture in the animal kingdom. I believe that is largely true in the human world when it comes to our baser instincts. Maslow's hierarchy of needs can be tossed about in a philosophical discussion but at the end of the day he had pretty good grip on what our human nature would put first - self.
This is why the Apostle Paul wrote to the Roman church to not be conformed to fit into this world (our fallen nature makes that a rather simple process) but to let God "transform" us by His Spirit to become the worshipers He created. Translation: I cannot stop being fallen but God can redeem me from my nature and "civilize" me for Himself. All of which has been said before, and was in fact said during the sermon this morning (www.mylhcc.com/podcasts).
However, I feel compelled to remind myself that the Doctor, who meant well, truly believed and really tried to change the nature of the leopard - but to no avail. He wanted his child to have the excitement of growing up with a large cat, but, the cat could never become the pet he wanted it to be unless he was able to transform its very nature.
Which brings me, happily and finally, to my point. When followers of Jesus, who have submitted to the transforming process attempt to play/work/coexist with those who do not yet follow Jesus - they may be tempted to try to "domesticate" them. Teach them the principles of Jesus and the moral laws of God. However, just as a leopard is always a leopard - until - it has been transformed into a tabby, those who do not yet follow Jesus use works like love, trust, fairness, commitment and giving - to name only a few - far differently than those who are transformed to use those words and the actions that result as God intended.
Love is not about feeling but about commitment. Trust is not limited to one arena such as family, tribe or union. Fairness is not about equal distribution but equal access. Commitment is not limited to signed document and giving begins with the obligation to God. Not something I can do when I am trying to conform to the ever changing landscape of the present culture. God alone can make those words mean those things which helps my understand one other thing Paul wrote in
2 Corinthians 6:14 (NIV) "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"
Six months later we stopped in to find the "kitty" had playfully killed the two lion hunting dogs and was deemed "beyond redemption." It doesn't take a great mental leap to conclude that nature - more often than not - will rule over nurture in the animal kingdom. I believe that is largely true in the human world when it comes to our baser instincts. Maslow's hierarchy of needs can be tossed about in a philosophical discussion but at the end of the day he had pretty good grip on what our human nature would put first - self.
This is why the Apostle Paul wrote to the Roman church to not be conformed to fit into this world (our fallen nature makes that a rather simple process) but to let God "transform" us by His Spirit to become the worshipers He created. Translation: I cannot stop being fallen but God can redeem me from my nature and "civilize" me for Himself. All of which has been said before, and was in fact said during the sermon this morning (www.mylhcc.com/podcasts).
However, I feel compelled to remind myself that the Doctor, who meant well, truly believed and really tried to change the nature of the leopard - but to no avail. He wanted his child to have the excitement of growing up with a large cat, but, the cat could never become the pet he wanted it to be unless he was able to transform its very nature.
Which brings me, happily and finally, to my point. When followers of Jesus, who have submitted to the transforming process attempt to play/work/coexist with those who do not yet follow Jesus - they may be tempted to try to "domesticate" them. Teach them the principles of Jesus and the moral laws of God. However, just as a leopard is always a leopard - until - it has been transformed into a tabby, those who do not yet follow Jesus use works like love, trust, fairness, commitment and giving - to name only a few - far differently than those who are transformed to use those words and the actions that result as God intended.
Love is not about feeling but about commitment. Trust is not limited to one arena such as family, tribe or union. Fairness is not about equal distribution but equal access. Commitment is not limited to signed document and giving begins with the obligation to God. Not something I can do when I am trying to conform to the ever changing landscape of the present culture. God alone can make those words mean those things which helps my understand one other thing Paul wrote in
2 Corinthians 6:14 (NIV) "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"
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